Your body will need time to get back to it’s original state. The first six weeks are a time of healing, re-balancing and recovery. It takes the genital organs from six weeks to two months to return to their original size and function. The pregnancy hormone relaxin, which increases the size and elasticity of connective tissues, will remain in a new mothers body for up to five months. This is why a new mother’s joints are so fragile.  Prolactin, the hormone which produces milk in breastfeeding mothers, has a similar effect. In 66 percent of women, the vertical abdominal muscles have separated and take at least six weeks to heal.  Although you may be anxious to loose weight and get back into shape, your body needs rest and you should consult your doctor before beginning any exercise routines.

Due to the enormous hormonal upheaval of a new mother’s body, 80 percent of women will experience the “baby blues.” The most common symptoms are tears, often for no apparent reason, mood swings, hypersensitivity, difficulty in concentrating, anxiety, feelings of discouragement and vulnerability, restless sleep patterns. This is not an illness and can be treated with rest and support.  However, postnatal depression is a psychiatric illness which affects one in ten new mothers and must be treated with medication and therapy.

Sylvia Brown has three tips for overcoming fatigue.  Theoretically they should work wonders, but unless you have live-in help or a mother around the corner, I don’t know many women who can indulge in this advice. But here they are anyway, maybe you can find a way to incorporate some of them.

1. Planning ahead before the baby’s birth — Who will help with household chores? Who will take care of the older children? Who will you be able to leave the baby with to get out of the house for a short break? ask your friends for baby-sitting or housekeeping help as a baby gift. Or maybe for someone to shop, cook a meal and wash the dishes for you.
2. Sleep whenever you can (ideally, you should have two naps a day in the first few weeks). If the baby is napping, drop everything and sleep as well. Nothing is more important than your rest.
3. Recreation: get out of the house, do some sort of “adult” activity each day, even for 45 minutes. You’ll be amazed at how this can lift your spirits.

I slept with my daughter until she was two and expecting my second child. Now I sleep with my 5-month old son and have no plans yet to move him out of my bed. When people comment on it, I reply that I like having him close by. Yes, it’s slightly uncomfortable to sleep with him next to me (my arm gets numb and tingly if it’s wrapped around him too long, my back hurts when I’m curled around him in a funny position, or when I fall asleep feeding him…) but for me that’s better than having to get out of bed and go to his room a few times a night to feed him. I like that he’s so close by I can sense him wriggling around and can feed him before he wakes up completely. I like to know he’s right there next to me and that he’s OK.

For those who are unaware of the facts, sleeping with your baby in bed may indeed sound like a dangerous practice. What if she falls off or gets stuck between the mattress? What if one parent rolls onto the baby, or she gets smothered by a pillow or blanket? But when you examine the reality of the situation, it’s apparent that sleeping with your baby in a safe manner may actually be healthier for her than putting her to sleep alone in a crib.

Dr. Sears points out that the incidence of SIDS is dramatically higher in a crib versus a parent’s bed. Although there are cases of accidental smothering and entrapment, such situations are very rare. The September/October 2002 issue of Mothering Magazine presents research done throughout the whole world on the issue of safe sleep. They conclude that not only is sleeping with your baby safe, but it is actually much safer than having your baby sleep in a crib. Infants who sleep in a crib are twice as likely to suffer a sleep related fatality (including SIDS) than infants who sleep in bed with their parents.

Instead of warning parents not to sleep with their babies, Dr. Sears advocates teaching parents how to sleep safely in bed with their babies. Much of this is common sense, but here are the guidelines he suggests:

• It is unlikely for baby to fall out of bed while sleeping next to mother. Dr. Sears compares it to a heat-seeking missiles; babies automatically gravitate toward a warm body. But to be on the safe side, place baby between mother and a guardrail or push the mattress flush against the wall and position baby between mother and the wall. Be sure there are no crevices that baby could sink into.

• Place baby adjacent to mother, rather than between mother and father. Many mothers feel they are so physically and mentally aware of their baby’s presence even while sleeping, that it’s extremely unlikely they would roll over onto their baby. Some fathers, on the other hand, may not enjoy the same sensitivity of baby’s presence while asleep; so it is possible they might roll over on or throw out an arm onto baby. After a few months of sleep-sharing, most dads seem to develop a keen awareness of their baby’s presence.
• Place baby to sleep on his back.
• Use a large bed, preferably a queen-size or king-size. A king-size bed may wind up being your most useful piece of “baby furniture.” If you only have a cozy double bed, use the money that you would ordinarily spend on a fancy crib and other less necessary baby furniture and treat yourselves to a safe and comfortable king-size bed.
• Some parents and babies sleep better if baby is still in touching and hearing distance, but not in the same bed. For them a bedside bassinet or co-sleeper is a good option. This arrangement gives parents and baby their own separate sleeping spaces yet, keeps baby within arm’s reach for easy nighttime care. Dr. Sears suggests the Arm’s Reach® Co-Sleeper® Bassinet (www.armsreach.com).

• Do not sleep with your baby if:
  1. You are under the influence of any drug, alcohol, or tranquilizers. If you are drunk or drugged, these chemicals lessen your arousability from sleep.
  2. You are extremely obese. Obesity itself may cause sleep apnea in the mother, in addition to the smothering risk.
  3. You are exhausted from sleep deprivation. This lessens your awareness of your baby and your arousability from sleep.
  4. You are sleeping on a cushiony surface, such as a waterbed or couch.
• Don’t allow older siblings to sleep with a baby under nine months. Sleeping children do not have the same awareness of tiny babies as do parents, and too small or too crowded a bed space is an unsafe sleeping arrangement for a tiny baby.
• Don’t overheat or overbundle baby. Be particularly aware of overbundling if baby is sleeping with a parent. Other warm bodies are an added heat source.
• Don’t wear lingerie with string ties longer than eight inches. Ditto for dangling jewelry. Baby may get caught in these entrapments.
• Avoid pungent hair sprays, deodorants, and perfumes. Not only will these camouflage the natural maternal smells that baby is used to and attracted to, but foreign odors may irritate and clog baby’s tiny nasal passages.

Every mother knows the feeling of trying to soothe a screaming baby. I’m sure every mother has wished at one time or another that baby could just TELL me what’s bothering him! Is he hungry? Tired? Uncomfortable? Gas?

Now you needn’t guess any longer! Priscilla Dunstan’s eidetic memory (a photographic memory for sound) and mother’s intuition helped her discover a universal baby language. Her theory was tested with over a thousand babies, of more than 30 nationalities. Three independent international studies, confirmed the existence of a universal baby language - the Dunstan Baby Language.

Every infant from birth to age three months communicates using the same sounds. These five cries are based on various relexes that a baby has. The “neh” sound is based on the sucking reflex, and means the baby is hungry.  “Owh” is based on the yawn reflex and means baby is tired. “Eh” means baby wants to burp, “air” means baby has gas, and “heh” means baby is uncomfortable (too hot, too cold, needs a new diaper, etc.) These “words” occur even before a baby starts to cry.

If you want to learn more about communicating with your baby, check out the Dunstan Baby Language System. You can also watch Priscilla Dunstan in a video interview at iVillage.com.

My aunt bought me the Patemm changing pad (”a revolution in diaper changing”) as a baby gift. She discovered it after her own daughter (my cousin) had a baby and someone must have bought her this latest mommy-must-have item.

What is it? It’s kind of like a portable diaper bag. When it’s opened up, it’s a large, round changing pad with an easy-clean, wipeable surface. Along the edges are pockets to keep spare diapers, wipes, ointment, and even a change of clothes. Then it folds up into a handy little square package with handles that make it easy to carry along with you wherever you go! It’s really a brilliant idea!

The Patemm pad comes in 22 fun prints all with chocolate brown trim and sewn-in polyester batting. Mine is baby blue, but I really like their patterned pads, such as the red&white “Emma“, or the grey&black “Jack Martin.”

They also have a super-handy, compartmentalized “bote bag” (bottle bag) and small pouches called pitakas which fit perfectly in the patemm pad pockets and can hold hold wipes, small ointments, etc.

Check out the Patemm website to view the funky patterns they come in and read parent’s feedback. It really is “A smart, stylish and practical solution to the diaper bag… makes changing your little one quick and simple… The mom-invented patemm™ pads have received national and international acclaim by parents, caretakers and the media and has truly become an essential baby item!”

According to this story on HollyScoop, Jennifer Lopez is really setting out to spoil her twins. Not only has she hired a color therapist and professional baby masseuse to pamper her babies, she has also splurged on “Egyptian cotton cot linen, designer Babygros, diamond-engraved rattles and two small ponies.”

But that’s far from the most disturbing part. The “insider” has confided that JLo is “super-paranoid about hygiene. The twins’ wing is totally sterile and all flowers and presents are stored in a separate room, so they don’t contaminate the babies’ area… All house guests must also use an antiseptic hand lotion and wear surgical masks before they enter the children’s nursery.”

That is just crazy!

According to holistic practitioner Natasha Trenev, author of Probiotics: Nature’s Internal Healers, healthy bacteria such as Bifidobacteria and Bene bacteria guard against bad germs in the large bowel and stimulate weight gain in infants. “What we’ve done environmentally is sterilize everything. Healthy bacteria can’t thrive,” she says. There is no need for the current obssesion with sterilization and cleanliness. “A study done in Sweden and Astonia found that babies raised in sterile hospital environments experienced a six-fold increase in allergies.”

CNN calls it the “Hygiene hypothesis,” which holds that when babies are exposed to germs, it helps them fight allergies and asthma later. The presence of some germs allows babies’ and children’s immune systems to develop properly.

According to a study written up in Time Magazine, more people are coming down with allergies and autoimmune disorders like multiple sclerosis (MS) than in the past. One theory is that children live in cleaner environments and are exposed to fewer microbes. Researchers report that test subjects who had the greatest number of younger siblings, no more than six years apart in age, were the least likely to develop MS. It seems that the infections they caught from the younger kids helped train their immune system not to attack their own nerves, which is what happens with MS.

It’s also important to understand when and how to use antibiotics. Antibiotics are only effective against bacterial infections (like strep throat) not viruses (like colds or the flu). C.Health states that the overuse of antibacterial products, including soaps, gels, and antibiotics for throat infections and other ailments, can result in stronger germs that are resistant to the effects of antibiotics.

So what’s the bottom line? If your toddler eats food that was dropped on the floor before you have time to snatch it away, don’t worry. Children are perfectly able to eat non-sterilized food and live in non-sterile environments! Even without the scientific evidence, it never made sense to me to be constantly sanitizing every surface your child comes in contact with. The best way to avoid harmful bacteria is simply good, old fashioned soap and water.

In my own defense, I’m not lazy, I read that it is not necessary to give babies a bath more than once or twice a day (unless they are dirty, obviously). I mean really, it’s a whole production to give my 2-month old a bath… heat the room, warm the water, set up the baby bath, get the towels, diapers, soaps, etc ready… and it’s no easier for my 2-year old, who is going through an aversion toward the bathtub.

Anyway, the health news article states that “more than 80 percent of infants tested in a new study had been exposed to a potentially harmful group of chemicals known as phthalates.” Parents are cautioned to limit their use of baby shampoos, powders and lotions until more is known.

Scientist still don’t know exactly what this means. I wouldn’t be too worried, since every day they come out and tell us something or another that we’ve been doing is harming our children. More often than not it’s just a lot of noise which recedes in a couple of weeks. But you should keep an eye out for more news on this subject. And stop bathing your kids every day!

A Mediterranean diet typically includes lots of vegetables, fruit, nuts and fish. It rarely includes red meat. This type of diet is high in antioxidants, which help keep the body healthy.

The study also found that eating red meat more than 3 or 4 times a week actually increased the risk of asthma and allergies.

1. TV & Computer Limitations - Set limitations for T.V. and the computer to no more than 2 hours per day.
2. Get your Finances in Order - Having your finances in disarray funnels out negatively onto your children.
3. Limit Junk Food - Limiting junk food and soda from your child’s diet can help him/her think more clearly.
4. Volunteer - Getting your family involved in the community helps focus on others & not just self.
5. Quality Time - Plan family fun activities together such as weekend outings and family game nights.
6. Get Fit- Incorporate regular exercise into your children’s daily routines, such as red light green light, or a family stroll around the neighborhood.
7. Relax! - Take regular breaks yourself. A little time-off will do you and everyone in the family some good.
8. Quit Smoking - Second-hand smoke can cause serious health problems in all members of your household including your children.
9. Be Consistent - Setting limits and boundaries minimize behavorial problems in children which creates stability and a more peaceful home life.
10. Encourage - Be encouraging to your children and focus on their successes and even if they fail at something, be there to support their efforts.